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Quotations by author » Groucho Marx
American Comedian, Actor and Singer, 1890-1977
Quotes: 1 - 20 of 129 Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Next Last
A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
Animals
A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
Uncategorized
A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast
Uncategorized
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
Uncategorized
A man's only as old as the woman he feels.
Uncategorized
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
Uncategorized
Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
Age
Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.
Uncategorized
All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.
Uncategorized
And I want to thank you for all the enjoyment you've taken out of it.
Uncategorized
Anybody who doesn't like this book is healthy
Books
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
Uncategorized
Before I speak, I have something important to say.
Uncategorized
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
Funny
Believe me, you have to get up early if you want to get out of bed
Uncategorized
Blood's not thicker than money
Uncategorized
Did I ever tell you how I shot a wild elephant in my pyjamas? How he got into my pyjamas I'll never know.
Uncategorized
Do you mind if I don't smoke ?
Smoking
Do you suppose I could buy back my introduction to you?
Uncategorized
Don't look now, but there's one too many in this room and I think it's you
Uncategorized
Quotes: 1 - 20 of 129 Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Next Last
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