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| When I am king, they shall not have bread and shelter only, but also teachings out of books, for a full belly is little worth where the mind is starved | | Uncategorized | |
| When I reflect upon the number of disagreeable people who I know who have gone to a better world, I am moved to lead a different life. | | Uncategorized | |
| When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years. | | Uncategorized | |
| When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished by how much he'd learned in seven years. | | Family; Teenage | |
| When I was a boy on the Mississippi River there was a proposition in a township there to discontinue public schools because they were too expensive. An old farmer spoke up and said if they stopped building the schools they would not save anything, because every time a school was closed a jail had to be built. | | Uncategorized | |
| When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not. | | Uncategorized | |
| When I was younger, I could remember anything whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying . . . soon I [won't] remember anything but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. | | Uncategorized | |
| When I'm playful I use the meridians of longitude and parallels of latitude for a seine, and drag the Atlantic Ocean for whales. ... Life on the Mississippi | | Uncategorized | |
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| When it comes down to pure ornamental cursing, the native American is gifted above the sons of men. | | Uncategorized | |
| When it's steamboat time, you steam | | Time | |
| When one has tasted watermelon he knows what the angels eat | | Uncategorized | |
| When one reads Bibles, one is less surprised at what the Deity knows than at what He doesn't know | | Uncategorized | |
| When one's character begins to fall under suspicion and disfavor, how swift, then, is the work of disintegration and destruction | | Uncategorized | |
| When people do not respect us we are sharply offended; yet in his private heart no man much respects himself | | Uncategorized | |
| When red-haired people are above a certain social grade their hair is auburn | | Uncategorized | |
| When some men discharge an obligation you can hear the report for miles around | | Uncategorized | |
| When the doctrine of allegiance to party can utterly up-end a man's moral constitution and make a temporary fool of him besides, what excuse are you going to offer for preaching it, teaching it, extending it, perpetuating it? Shall you say, the best good of the country demands allegiance to party? Shall you also say it demands that a man kick his truth and his conscience into the gutter, and become a mouthing lunatic, besides? | | Uncategorized | |
| When the human race has once acquired a superstition nothing short of death is ever likely to remove it | | Uncategorized | |
| When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained. | | Life | |
