| |
| Nothing shortens a journey so pleasantly as an account of misfortunes at which the hearer is permitted to laugh. | | Uncategorized | |
| Of course I lie to people. But I lie altruistically - for our mutual good. The lie is the basic building block of good manners. That may seem mildly shocking to a moralist - but then what isn't? | | Lies | |
| Sex is the last refuge of the miserable | | Sex | |
| Tears were to me what glass beads are to African traders. | | Uncategorized | |
| The consuming desire of most human beings is deliberately to plant their whole life in the hands of some other person. I would describe this method of searching for happiness as immature. Development of character consists solely in moving toward self-sufficiency. | | Uncategorized | |
| The curiosity of the neighbors about you, is a tribute to your individuality, and you should encourage it | | Uncategorized | |
| The English think incompetence is the same thing as sincerity | | Uncategorized | |
| The formula for achieving a successful relationship is simple: you should treat all disasters as if they were trivialities but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster | | Relationships | |
| |
| The trouble with children is that they are not returnable | | Uncategorized | |
| The very purpose of existence is to reconcile the glowing opinion we hold of ourselves with the appalling things that other people think about us. | | Existence; Goals; Opinions; People | |
| The war between the sexes is the only one in which both sides regularly sleep with the enemy | | Sexes | |
| The worst part of being gay in the twentieth century is all that damn disco music to which one has to listen | | Uncategorized | |
| The young always have the same problem - how to rebel and conform at the same time. They have now solved this by defying their parents and copying one another. | | Problems; Youth | |
| There are three reasons for becoming a writer: the first is that you need the money; the second that you have something to say that you think the world should know; the third is that you can't think what to do with the long winter evenings. | | Writers | |
| There is no need to do any housework at all. After the first four years the dirt doesn't get any worse. | | Housework | |
| This school was on top of a hill so that God could see everything that went on. It looked like a cross between a prison and a church and it was. | | Uncategorized | |
| This woman did not fly to extremes; she lived there. | | Uncategorized | |
| Though intelligence is powerless to modify character, it is a dab hand at finding euphemisms for its weaknesses | | Intelligence | |
| To know all is not to forgive all. It is to despise everybody. | | Uncategorized | |
