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| I can't seem to bring myself to say, "Well, I guess I'll be toddling along." It isn't that I can't toddle. It's that I can't guess I'll toddle. | | Uncategorized | |
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| I do most of my work sitting down; that's where I shine. | | Uncategorized | |
| I don't trust a bank that would lend money to such a poor risk. | | Uncategorized | |
| I have been told by hospital authorities that more copies of my works are left behind by departing patients than those of any other author. | | Uncategorized | |
| I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well. | | Uncategorized | |
| I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death, but then I'm in no hurry. | | Uncategorized | |
| If Mr. Einstein doesn't like the natural laws of the universe, let him go back to where he came from. | | Uncategorized | |
| If you think that you have caught a cold, call in a good doctor. Call in three good doctors and play bridge. | | Uncategorized | |
| In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children. | | Travel | |
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| It is rather to be chosen than great riches, unless I have omitted something from the quotation | | Uncategorized | |
| It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous | | Uncategorized | |
| Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, owing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about. | | Uncategorized | |
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| Tell us your phobias and we will tell you what you are afraid of. | | Uncategorized | |
| The biggest obstacle to professional writing is the necessity for changing a typewriter ribbon. | | Uncategorized | |
| The free-lance writer is a man who is paid per piece or per word or perhaps. | | Uncategorized | |
| The most common of all antagonisms arises from a man's taking a seat beside you on the train, a seat to which he is completely entitled. | | Uncategorized | |
