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| A comedian can only last 'til he either takes himself serious or his audience takes him serious. | | Uncategorized | |
| A conference is just an admission that you want somebody to join you in your troubles. | | Uncategorized | |
| A Congressman is never any better than his roads, and sometimes worse. | | Uncategorized | |
| A conservative is a man who has plenty of money and don't see any reason why he shouldn't always have plenty of money | | Uncategorized | |
| A country can get more real joy out of just hollering for their freedom than they can if they get it. | | Uncategorized | |
| A difference of opinion is what makes horse racing and missionaries. | | Uncategorized | |
| A diplomat is one that says something that is equally misunderstood by both sides, and never clear to either. | | Uncategorized | |
| A fanatic is always the fellow on the opposite side. | | Uncategorized | |
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| A holding company is a thing where you hand an accomplice the goods while the policeman searches you. | | Uncategorized | |
| A man gets up to speak and says nothing . . . nobody listens . . . and then everybody disagrees. | | Uncategorized | |
| A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people | | Learning | |
| A man that don't love a horse, there is something the matter with him. | | Uncategorized | |
| A politician is not as narrow-minded as he forces himself to be. | | Uncategorized | |
| A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth | | Uncategorized | |
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| About all I can say for the United States Senate is that it opens with a prayer and closes with an investigation. | | America and Americans | |
| Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need. | | Advertising | |
| After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut. | | Uncategorized | |
| Alexander Hamilton originated the put and take system in our national treasury: the taxpayers put it in, and the politicians take it out | | Politicians | |