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| Over in Hollywood they almost made a great picture, but they caught it just in time |
| Uncategorized |
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| Popularity is exhausting. The life of the party almost always winds up in a corner with an overcoat over him. |
| Uncategorized |
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| Some of the greatest love affairs I've known have involved one actor unassisted |
| Uncategorized |
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| The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away. |
| Best friend |
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| The cuckoo who is on to himself is halfway out of the clock. |
| Uncategorized |
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| The days just prior to marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book |
| Uncategorized |
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| The difference between chirping out of turn and a faux pas depends on what kind of a bar you're in |
| Uncategorized |
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| The first dawn of smartness is to stop trying things you don't know anything about - especially if they run to anything over a dollar |
| Uncategorized |
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| The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn't been asleep |
| Uncategorized |
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| The most efficient water power in the world - women's tears |
| Uncategorized |
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| The only bird that gives the poor a real tumble is the stork |
| Uncategorized |
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| The only time that most women give their orating husbands undivided attention is when the old boys mumble in their sleep |
| Husbands; Men and Women |
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| The worst tempered people I have ever met were those who knew that they were wrong. |
| Uncategorized |
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| The worst tempered people I've ever met were people who knew they were wrong |
| Speech |
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| The worst-tempered people I've ever met were the people who knew they were wrong. |
| Temper |
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| There is something about a closet that makes a skeleton terribly restless |
| Uncategorized |
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| There's nothing so comfortable as a small bankroll. A big one is always in danger. |
| Uncategorized |
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| Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up. |
| Death and dying |
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