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| A politician is a man who will double cross that bridge when he comes to it. |
| Uncategorized |
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| A pun is the lowest form of humor - when you don't think of it first |
| Uncategorized |
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| An epigram is only a wisecrack that's played at Carnegie Hall. |
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| Behind the phony tinsel of Hollywood lies the real tinsel. |
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| Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome |
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| Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember. |
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| I don't drink; I don't like it - it makes me feel good |
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| I envy people who drink - at least they know what to blame everything on. |
| Drinking; Envy |
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| I have given up reading books; I find it takes my mind off myself. |
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| I have no trouble with y enemies. But my god damn friends... they are the ones that keep me walking the floors at night. |
| Enemies |
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| I once said cynically of a politician, "He'll double-cross that bridge when he comes to it |
| Politicians |
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| I think a lot of Bernstein - but not as much as he does. |
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| I was once thrown out of a mental hospital for depressing the other patients |
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| I'm going to memorize your name and throw my head away |
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